The Wonder of Your Love (A Land of Canaan Novel) Read online

  Martha snapped her fingers. “A woman like that only wants one thing. Money! I bet that tramp is coming to ask for money.”

  “I am not going to have you use such language in my house. Do you hear me?” Katie Ann cut her eyes at Martha across the table.

  “Fine. But I’m sure she must be trying to get some money out of you. That’s got to be it.”

  Katie Ann searched her heart and soul for a moment. “Maybe she’s coming to say she’s sorry?”

  Martha grunted. “I doubt it.” She pointed a crooked finger at Katie Ann. “And I know it’s your people’s way to forgive and forget, but the woman had an affair with your husband.”

  “I don’t need to be reminded, Martha, and yes . . . we do try hard to forgive.” She sighed. “Forgetting is not always so easy. Don’t you think I’m nervous about Lucy coming here tomorrow? But she’s traveled a very long way to talk to me.”

  “I don’t care if she took a rocket from the moon. She’s got no business here.”

  Katie Ann stood up, one arm folded across her churning stomach and her coffee cup in her other hand. She paced the kitchen. “I don’t want you here tomorrow morning, Martha. It will be hard enough just having Lucy here.”

  “Don’t worry. I won’t be here.”

  Katie Ann breathed a sigh of relief. She had expected resistance. “Gut,” she said as she smoothed wrinkles from her apron. “It will be best that way.”

  Martha scratched her nose, then pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and blew her nose. Then she blew it again, and again, and again.

  “Are you sick?” Katie Ann sat back down across from Martha.

  “Yes, I’m sick. I’m not well at all.” Martha squeezed her nose with the handkerchief and blew with force. “I feel like poop, but I’m forced to come over here in this weather this morning to find out about a letter from that . . .” She looked up at Katie Ann and huffed. “That woman.”

  “I was going to tell you. After my visit with Lucy.”

  Martha shook her head as her face shriveled into a frown. “I don’t even like to hear her name.”

  “Well, it doesn’t please me to say her name either.” Katie Ann decided to try to change the subject. “You said you went to the doctor the other day. Did you have this cold then?”

  “I don’t have a cold. I’m much sicker.” Martha pinched her lips together.

  Katie Ann knew that Martha often exaggerated her aches, pains, and illnesses. Sometimes her friend even faked ill health for attention. When the women first became friends, Martha often complained of a backache. Katie Ann was never sure of the extent of the ailment, but Martha’s backaches always manifested when she needed something from Katie Ann, even if it was just companionship. And when Martha showed the slightest sign of a cold, she was worse than a child. But Katie Ann always showered Martha with sympathy and affection—sick or not sick. Because the woman truly was her best friend.

  However, Martha disliked doctors. For all her aches and pains, Katie Ann couldn’t recall one single time Martha had visited a physician.

  “I’m sorry you feel poorly. What’s wrong with you?” Katie Ann tapped her finger to her chin. “And what type of routine tests did you have?”

  Martha stood up from the table, straightening the collar of her black velour pullover. “Once a year I force myself to visit that idiot doctor in Alamosa, and I let him run all those stupid tests on me. And every year, I’m fine.”

  “Did you mention your cold?”

  Martha slammed her hands to her hips. “Did you not hear me? I don’t have a cold.” She raised her chin. “I’m very ill.” She lowered her gaze. “I have to go for more tests tomorrow.”

  Katie Ann eased closer to her friend. “What kind of tests?”

  “Lung tests.”

  That sounded serious to Katie Ann, but she tried to speak as though she wasn’t concerned. “I’m sure everything will be fine.”

  Martha sighed. “I doubt it. But we all gotta go sometime.”

  She didn’t say anything more as she turned and walked toward the living room.

  “Martha . . .” Katie Ann caught up to Martha by the front door. “Do you want me to go with you to the doctor?”

  “And cancel that fine visit with Lucy you have scheduled?” She grunted, rolling her eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of asking you to do that.”

  Katie Ann grinned as she stuffed her hands in the pockets of her apron. “Martha, now you stop it. You know I’ll cancel with Lucy to be with you.”

  “Do you even know where she’s staying?”

  “Well, no . . . but . . .”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll give you a full report tomorrow evening.” Martha frowned. “Kiss Jonas for me. I don’t think I should be too close to him until the doctor finds out what’s wrong with me.”

  “I will. But please come over tomorrow evening and let me know what the doctor said.”

  Martha cut her eyes at Katie Ann. “Only if you tell me what that horrible Lucy had to say.” She pulled on her gloves, then pointed a finger at Katie Ann. “I still say she’s here for money.”

  Money was something Katie Ann had plenty of, thanks to a mysterious box of cash that had been left on her doorstep last year—money she suspected had originated from Martha, even though the woman denied it. But she couldn’t imagine Lucy coming all the way to Colorado to ask for money from Katie Ann, the woman whose husband she’d stolen.

  “I don’t think she’s coming to ask for money.”

  “No, you wouldn’t think that. You see the good in everyone.”

  Katie Ann didn’t say anything, but she certainly didn’t see the good in what Lucy Turner had done. Or her husband. And forgiveness was much farther out of reach than Martha might realize. It was something Katie Ann struggled with daily.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

  “Hey, wait.” Martha lifted her chin. “You didn’t tell me about Eli. How’d it go after I left?”

  “Fine.” Katie Ann grinned, intentionally fueling Martha’s curiosity.

  Martha cackled. “Really?” She leaned closer and whispered, “I think that man’s got a thing for you.”

  “Well, you’re wrong. We agreed to be friends, though. And that’s all. We are at two very different places in life.”

  A full smile spread across Martha’s face. “The fact that you are both trying to clarify the relationship this early on . . . well, that means something. When are you going to see him again?”

  “What makes you think I’ll see him again?” Katie Ann fought to hide her expression as she realized that she was looking forward to Tuesday.

  Martha tried to snap her gloved fingers. “Aha! You are going to see him again. When?”

  Katie Ann lifted one shoulder as she pulled her eyes from Martha’s. “Tuesday.”

  Martha’s eyes grew round. “Fabulous!”

  “We’re going to travel together to see the sand dunes, as friends. Eli is hiring a driver.”

  Martha crossed herself, which she often did, even though she wasn’t Catholic. “Thank God. I’ve been praying for you to find someone.” She let out a heavy sigh. “In case I kick the bucket, you’ll have someone to take care of you.”

  Again Katie Ann felt sure Martha was exaggerating, but the comment was disturbing nonetheless. “Don’t say things like that, Martha.”

  Martha hugged Katie Ann. “Don’t you worry about a thing.” She kissed Katie Ann on the cheek and closed the door behind her.

  And for the first time since she’d met Martha and nursed her through a host of ailments, some real, some not so real— Katie Ann felt truly worried about her friend.

  Five

  LUCY THANKED HER HOSTESS AT THE MANSION BED-and-Breakfast after a meal that should have been more than satisfying. Eggs Benedict were her favorite, and the fruit bowl and homemade granola also topped the list of her preferred breakfast items. But this morning her stomach roiled with anxiety, and she wondered if coming all this way to see Katie Ann w
as a mistake. Ivan’s wife might be Amish, but she was still human, and Lucy had seen the loathing in Katie Ann’s eyes on Saturday. She wished this trip hadn’t been necessary, but after much deliberation, she didn’t see any way around it.

  She carted her red suitcase to her rental car, popped the trunk, and stored the luggage inside. It was only ten miles from the B&B in Monte Vista to Katie Ann’s house, and she planned to drive as slowly as possible. She’d hoped to get this dreaded visit over with on Saturday and be back in Lancaster County by now, but she was certainly willing to work around Katie Ann’s schedule. That was the least she could do.

  As she pulled off the main highway, she touched her hand to her stomach and felt the baby kick. In the darkness of the other night, and with a heavy coat on, her pregnancy hadn’t been noticeable to Katie Ann. The last thing she wanted to do was cause the woman more pain. But she didn’t have a choice. Ivan was gone, and he’d been the only person who could explain the contents of the box he’d left behind. Lucy’s future depended on Katie Ann being able to identify the picture.

  She took a deep breath and tried to calm her rapid heartbeat. So many times she’d wanted to defend herself to Katie Ann and the members of her community. She knew that everyone in the Old Order district thought she’d seduced Ivan away from his wife, that surely no good Amish man would pursue an Englisch woman. If they only knew.

  She thought back on Ivan’s many advances and wished more than anything that she could go back in time, wished she had never agreed to have lunch with the handsome Amish man who was clearly unhappy at home. One lunch led to another, until eventually Ivan had kissed her. She ended it after that, but Ivan only tried harder. Every day he would wander into the café where she worked. He’d also call her from a cell phone he was hiding from Katie Ann. And when he said he never loved anyone the way he loved her, she had melted. All she’d ever wanted was to be loved, and she’d managed to go thirty-two years without true love. Until Ivan.

  She pulled into the driveway that led up to Katie Ann’s house. She glanced to her left at the house she knew to be Samuel and Lillian’s. She hoped that neither of them would be at Katie Ann’s when she arrived. Or the scary woman who had been there on Saturday night. It would be hard enough to talk to Katie Ann without an audience.

  KATIE ANN PULLED the last of the clothes through the wringer washer, then began to hang the wet items in the mudroom. Temperatures had dropped during the night, and a blanket of frost still covered everything at nine o’clock this morning. She’d tried to stay busy for the past four hours, since she’d gotten up to nurse Jonas. After feeding her little one, he’d drifted back to sleep, and Katie Ann had busied herself cleaning and washing clothes. Anything to keep her mind off Lucy’s impending visit.

  She didn’t know the woman well at all. She had worked at a café back in Lancaster County, and they’d only spoken a handful of times before Katie Ann caught Ivan kissing her one day. After that, her husband had promised her that he’d stopped seeing Lucy, that there’d never been more than a shared kiss and a few phone calls. Katie Ann knew now that Ivan had lied to her, and she couldn’t help but wonder if there were other untruths built around his relationship with Lucy. Maybe he had tried to end it with Lucy, but Katie Ann could still remember the way she begged Ivan not to leave their marriage. She and Ivan had relocated to Colorado for a new beginning, but Ivan’s heart had remained in Lancaster County. And even though Katie Ann had adjusted nicely to her life in Colorado, Lancaster County was where her own roots were. She wondered if she would ever move back there.

  As she clipped a towel to a hanger, she recalled Ivan’s funeral a few months ago. Lucy had been racked with grief, and Katie Ann almost felt sorry for the woman. Almost. But there was always enough bitterness in Katie Ann’s heart to drown out any sympathy for Lucy. Perhaps she shouldn’t have even agreed to this meeting. An urgent matter?

  She thought about what Martha said. Could Lucy be coming to ask for money? When she heard a car pulling in, she left the rest of the wet clothes in the laundry basket. Her stomach clenched tight as she smoothed the wrinkles from her black apron and moved through the house. Her heart felt like it would beat out of her chest as she stood on the other side of the closed door, waiting for Lucy to knock. She listened to her heels click up the porch steps, then a soft tap against the door.

  Katie Ann opened the front door, took one look at Lucy, and almost gasped. A knot formed in her throat, and she couldn’t speak.

  “Hello, Katie Ann.” Lucy tried to pull her long beige coat tighter around her, but it didn’t hide her enlarged belly.

  Katie Ann managed to open the door and motion for Lucy to enter.

  “Come in,” she finally said after Lucy was already inside the living room and Katie Ann was shutting the door. She could hear the tremble in her voice, and she wondered if Lucy was half as nervous as she was.

  “I guess you must have noticed . . .” Lucy’s voice trailed off as she placed both hands on her stomach. “I’m six months pregnant.”

  “Ivan’s?” Katie Ann asked.

  Lucy looked down at her brown boots. “Yes.”

  Katie Ann moved as if she were a character in someone else’s nightmare, unable to believe that this adulteress was in her home. Any earlier thoughts of polite small talk or an offer of coffee slipped from her mind. Still standing, she asked, “What do you want, Lucy?”

  Lucy’s bottom lip trembled as she avoided eye contact with Katie Ann. “First of all, I want to say how very sorry I am. For everything.”

  She looked up at Katie Ann as a tear rolled down her cheek, and Katie Ann stared at her, knowing she didn’t have one ounce of forgiveness for the woman, despite what she’d said, thought, or prayed about in the past. And she had no plans to make this visit easy on her.

  “What do you want?” she asked again.

  Katie Ann was surprised at how plain Lucy looked. She didn’t have on the heavy makeup she’d seen her wear before, and her clothes were conservative, not as if she’d selected them that morning with the intention of seducing someone’s husband. Perhaps being pregnant had humbled the woman.

  Still standing, Lucy reached into her oversized brown purse and pulled out a wooden box. “I found this after Ivan died.” She held out a small cedar container for Katie Ann to see.

  Katie Ann recognized the box right away. It was half the size of a shoe box, and Ivan’s father had made it for him when he was a boy. He’d always kept it on their dresser.

  “What about it?” Katie Ann couldn’t imagine why Ivan’s old keepsake would have brought Lucy all the way to Colorado.

  Lucy leaned forward slightly and grimaced.

  Instinctively, Katie Ann took a step toward her. “Are you all right?”

  “Yes, just a hard kick from the little one.”

  Lucy smiled a bit, and Katie Ann stiffened. But despite her resentment of Lucy, she asked her if she would like to sit down.

  “Thank you.” Lucy kept her coat on, thankfully, and sat down on the couch.

  Katie Ann sat in the rocking chair across from her. “Lucy, I’m sure you didn’t come here to show me Ivan’s box.” She folded her hands in her lap, bit her bottom lip, and waited.

  “Actually, it’s what I found in the box.” Lucy unlatched the tiny clasp and pulled out a photograph. She reached across the coffee table and handed it to Katie Ann, who took it hesitantly. It was a picture of a house, a beautiful white house with black shutters and a white picket fence.

  Katie Ann handed the picture back to her. “Why are you showing me this?”

  Lucy’s voice wavered as she spoke, her eyes watering. “I was hoping you might know where this house is.” She reached back into the box and pulled out two keys. “These keys were in the box also. I think Ivan bought us a house somewhere, and—”

  Katie Ann blinked her eyes a few times. “What?”

  “I’m sorry, Katie Ann. I’m so sorry. But our bank account is wiped out, and I think Ivan used the money that wa
s in there to purchase this house. But I have no idea where it is. I know that sounds crazy, but I can’t afford to keep making the mortgage on our current house. They’ve cut my hours at the café, and I’ll need to stop working when the baby comes.”

  Katie Ann rubbed her forehead and tried to picture Ivan cleaning out their bank account. “That doesn’t sound like Ivan.”

  “The money was his. I mean, I had very little when we moved in together. So it isn’t like he stole my money or anything.” Lucy stood up. “I think he was planning to surprise me with a new home.”

  Katie Ann thought about all the ways Ivan used to surprise her in the past, whether just a bouquet of flowers, or even once a new buggy. She thought for a moment. “That doesn’t make any sense. Ivan would have put your house on the market to sell before he invested money to build a new one.” Katie Ann shook her head. “I can’t believe this is what you came here to talk to me about.”

  She wondered how much money Ivan had put in Lucy’s bank account. He’d told her he left with very little, but Katie Ann had never been familiar with their finances . . . until she’d started to run out of money several months after Ivan left her. Then the mysterious box of money showed up on her doorstep.

  “After Ivan was killed, I went to check our bank account,” Lucy said. “His landscaping company had been doing very well, and the money he’d been saving was gone. I haven’t made a mortgage payment since he died. We bought the house I’m in together, and I can’t afford it on my own. I’m going to lose my home, and I’m pregnant. So if I don’t find out if this is our house, I’m going to be homeless.”

  Katie Ann tried to absorb what Lucy was saying, but it still didn’t make sense. “If Ivan bought a house, there would be some paperwork or something. How could you not know about it?”

  Lucy raised her palms in the air. “Exactly. I was wondering if you knew anything about it.”

  “Why would I know? Ivan left me a year ago.” Katie Ann reached down, picked up the picture from the box on the coffee table again, and stared at it, resentment filling every pore.