Plain Peace Read online

  Anna forced herself to peel her eyes away from her future husband. She walked with Emma to the front row of benches.

  “I’m so happy for you,” Emma whispered as they took their seats.

  Anna took a deep breath. “I can’t believe this day is finally here.” She reached into the pocket of her white apron and rubbed the flattened dime between her fingers. It didn’t have any magical powers, but it would always be a treasured keepsake.

  The wish she’d made before leaving it on the railroad track that day had been fulfilled so beautifully.

  But what about Jacob? Had his wish come true as well?

  After the ceremony and the meal, Noah walked toward the barn, where he knew the men had gathered to tell jokes and sometimes smoke cigars. He missed those times. He’d felt uncomfortable about attending this wedding, since Bishop Byler had been the one to enforce his shunning and had almost caused his practice to go belly-up.

  Noah was actually surprised that the bishop had allowed him in his home. But Lucy had told Carley that the bishop was going to be making some changes, and that one of them involved Noah.

  He’d no sooner had the thought when he heard the bishop’s deep voice behind him. “I was hoping I would find time to talk to you.”

  Noah turned to the tall, stooped man. “What about?”

  “I want you to know that I will be making announcements to our congregation at the next worship service. Some of our people are letting their health go because they don’t want to go to any other doctor besides you.” He paused, stroking his gray beard. “Including mei fraa. So I will be allowing our community to seek your services.” He looked toward his house and rolled his eyes. “And it looks like other changes will be in order as well. My wife has seen to that.” One side of his mouth crooked up a bit before he walked away.

  Carley came running up to him, her beautiful face glowing with excitement.

  “The bishop just talked to me, so I know the surprise.” Noah kissed her on the cheek. “He’s going to let the people in his district come back to the clinic.”

  “Oh, we suspected that.” She grinned. “But that’s not the surprise.” Noah recalled that the surprise was for Lucy too. He couldn’t imagine what his wife had up her sleeve.

  “There’s your surprise.” Carley pointed to her left, and Noah grabbed his chest. “I can’t believe this.” He started walking toward the figure crossing the yard, speeding up as he got closer.

  “Samuel!” He threw his arms around his brother and held on. Finally, he eased away and turned to his sister-in-law. “Lillian, it’s so good to see you. What a wonderful surprise this is.” Noah turned to Carley and pointed a finger at her. “Sneaky, sneaky. When did you all plan this?” Without waiting for an answer, he turned back to Samuel. “And where are Anna and Elizabeth?”

  Lillian spoke up. “We left them with our dear friends, Martha and Arnold. The girls love staying there and, well, Samuel and I are thinking of this as a vacation.” Lillian giggled, and Noah couldn’t help but think of the day she arrived in Paradise so many years ago, a young girl without a clue about the Amish—or herself. She’d made a remarkable transformation and was a wonderful wife to Samuel, stepmother to David, and mother to Elizabeth and Anna, and even grandmother to David and Emily’s twins.

  “We made plans last month when we heard about the wedding,” Samuel added. “Since we’ve known the Bylers all our lives, this was also a gut excuse to come see all of you too. We were supposed to be here for the wedding, of course, but our flight was delayed.”

  “I’m just glad you’re here. It’s a wonderful surprise.” Noah hugged Samuel again, but as he looked over his brother’s shoulder, tears filled his eyes. He edged slowly toward his nephew as memories of the time they’d both spent in the hospital filled his mind.

  “How’s that kidney of mine working?” He grabbed David and pulled him into his arms.

  “Great, Onkel Noah. Just great.” Samuel’s son stepped back, and Noah looked him up and down, remembering the boy he’d watched grow up, the fifteen-year-old who had received Noah’s kidney. Then Noah spotted Emily. It had to be her. She was pushing a stroller with twins. How had so much time had gone by?

  His two sisters walked up, and Mary Ellen and Rebecca were both grinning from ear to ear. Noah could barely see someone behind them, and when his sisters separated, he saw Katie Ann. Her face shone as she walked up to him and gave him a hug.

  “We’re all together. This is just wunderbaar!”

  The word from Noah’s childhood came to him naturally, and he smiled at the comfort of it. But then he spotted Lucy standing off to the side, her eyes wide, staring at Katie Ann.

  And he couldn’t help but wonder how wunderbaar she felt at that moment.

  This is the big surprise?

  Lucy stared at the Stoltzfus clan, thinking about Ivan. She didn’t dare approach them. Noah and Carley might have accepted her, but she felt sure the others didn’t, and she surely couldn’t face Katie Ann.

  Lucy had felt so good about herself lately. But seeing Katie Ann reminded her of who she was, who she’d always be. A woman who’d had an affair with a married man. Who’d borne a child out of wedlock. The woman her mother told her daily that she was.

  Glancing around, she scanned the area looking for Benjamin, whom she’d last seen with Cora and Marianne. She wanted more than anything just to find him and go home. But she had come with Noah, Carley, and Jenna, so she was stuck here until they were ready to leave.

  She was looking all around when she noticed Katie Ann walking toward her. Lucy automatically changed course to avoid her. But then Katie Ann called her name.

  Lucy sighed. She owed it to the woman to stop and listen, though talking could never change what had happened. Lucy had already apologized several times, but apologies could only go so far. And neither of them would ever completely know why Ivan had done what he did. Or who he truly loved.

  Lucy had always wondered if the house she lived in had really been meant for Katie Ann and Ivan, if they’d planned to reconcile. The house was completely different from what Lucy and Ivan had discussed, almost as if he had built it for someone else.

  Katie Ann had told Lucy she’d never had any intention of reconciling with Ivan. But Lucy would always wonder if that had been on Ivan’s mind when he died. Part of my penance, to have to always wonder.

  “Hello, Lucy.”

  Katie Ann was as beautiful as ever, even with her plain clothes and no makeup. “Hi, Katie Ann.” Lucy could hardly look her in the eye.

  “How have you been?”

  Lucy swallowed hard as she wondered what the point of this was. Did Katie Ann want her to apologize again? Did she want to tell her what a horrible person she was? Lucy could handle that. She’d had lots of practice. “I’m fine. How have you been?”

  “Gut, gut. Eli and I stay very busy with Jonas, Eli’s children, and all our grandchildren. We really love living in Colorado.”

  “That’s good.” Lucy felt that scarlet A burning on her chest. She wished Katie Ann would just walk away. But no, things were about to get worse. Ivan’s two sisters, Mary Ellen and Rebecca, were walking toward them, and so was Lillian, Samuel’s wife. She recalled the way those women used to look at her when they’d run into her somewhere with Ivan. Or even without Ivan.

  For a brief moment, she had to remind herself that the Amish were pacifists. This was not going to be like a playground fight, and there would be no pulling of hair or anything like that. Still, it was their job as Katie Ann’s relatives to put Lucy in her place. Again. She waited.

  But they all greeted her with a smile. So did another woman who walked up to join them. “Lucy, do you know our friend, Sadie?”

  Lucy shook her head. “Nice to meet you.”

  Then another woman walked up. Lucy felt like she was standing in quicksand. And they were all going to watch her sink.

  “This is my mother, Sarah Jane,” Lillian said. “Since you are part of the family, I t
hought it would be gut for you to meet everyone.”

  “So nice to see you again, Lucy,” Lillian’s mother said. Lucy didn’t remember ever meeting her.

  Lucy couldn’t speak. Part of the family? Her nerves settled a bit when Carley walked up. “Wow. Look at all of us. Daughters of the promise.”

  Lucy bit her bottom lip. Was she being forgiven? Included? Was she really going to have a family that accepted her? How could that be after what she’d done to Katie Ann? Maybe they just wanted to see Benjamin. They would have to tolerate Lucy to have that.

  But this didn’t look or feel like grudging tolerance. It felt like . . . friendship, smiling at her from amidst a group of women who’d always disliked her. It was all very confusing, and as they talked among themselves, Lucy barely heard anything. But she did hear Katie Ann ask her if they could take a walk.

  “Oh, I don’t know. Benjamin is here somewhere, and I’d hate to leave him, and—”

  “There he is.” Lillian pointed toward the house. “The bride is holding him.”

  Lucy nodded. There was no getting out of it, so she got in step with Katie Ann.

  Katie Ann stopped when they got far enough away from the crowd not to be heard. “You look nice. I like your hair that color.” Katie Ann was obviously trying to make her feel comfortable, although she had no idea why. She touched her brown hair, knowing she’d looked very different last time Katie Ann saw her.

  “Thank you. It’s easier to take care of shorter. And I don’t color it anymore. I stay busy with Benjamin and work.” She shrugged, knowing Katie Ann would get to the point, but dreading it just the same.

  “Lucy, I’ve talked to Noah, Mary Ellen, Rebecca, and Samuel—all of Ivan’s siblings. They all want very much to have little Benjamin in their lives. And you.” She paused and took a deep breath. “I have told them all that I hope you can be a part of the family. And that I hold no ill will against you.”

  “How can you say that?” The words slipped from Lucy’s mouth before she had a chance to think.

  “I’m no saint, Lucy. I carried around a lot of bad feelings about you for a long time.” Katie Ann’s voice was stern but not harsh. “And if I lived here, I think it would be hard for us to be friends. But I understand from Carley that you’re a daughter of the promise, and this means a great deal to us. It’s a journey that all of us have traveled at some point in our lives. It’s sacred and dear to us.” She smiled. “And not always easy. I know that sometimes on our journey, forgiveness is a large part of the process.” She paused. “It took me a long time to forgive you.”

  Lucy hung her head. “I’m so sorry. I’m so very sorry.” She looked up, tears filling her eyes. “But I love Benjamin so much. And I did love Ivan, despite what we did.”

  Katie Ann pressed her lips together, and Lucy wished she hadn’t said that last part. But then Katie Ann nodded. “Of course you love Benjamin. And Ivan would want his family involved in Benjamin’s life. So I’m hoping that you’ll let them be a family to you.”

  A family? Lucy had never had anyone but her mother. She had always dreamed of having a big, loving family, but this was an unlikely source. She hung her head again, and this time she started to cry.

  Katie Ann put a hand on her arm. “Forgive yourself, Lucy.”

  Lucy sniffled, unsure what to say.

  “Because I forgave you a long time ago.”

  Lucy didn’t move as she watched the other woman walk away. She was thinking that Katie Ann might be the best person she’d ever met. How could Ivan have loved them both? She slowly made her way back to the house. Children seemed to be playing everywhere around her. Adults gathered in groups of three or four, laughing and talking.

  Lucy looked up at the bright blue October sky. Am I really a daughter of the promise?

  She spotted Marianne and Cora near the porch, chatting with a group of women. Marianne was holding Benjamin. As Lucy grew closer, she recognized Katie Ann, Lillian, Mary Ellen, Rebecca, Carley, and Sarah Jane. She walked up just as Marianne set Benjamin down on the ground in front of another little boy.

  “This is your bruder, Benjamin.” Katie Ann squatted down and pointed at Jonas. He was older now than when Lucy saw him last. “His name is Jonas.”

  Lillian walked to Lucy, put her arm through hers, and pulled her to the group. “Look at these two,” she said in a bubbly voice. “They really like each other.”

  They all laughed as Benjamin tugged at the jacket Jonas was wearing. It was impossible not to see the resemblance.

  Katie Ann looked up at Lucy and winked. “Welcome to the family.”

  Lucy bit her lip, and it took everything she had not to cry. Then everyone awwed when Benjamin hugged Jonas. Lucy closed her eyes for a few moments, thankful for this new circle of people in her life, for the changes she’d made within herself, and for all that God had blessed her with. She closed her eyes and silently spoke to God, knowing that He had been hearing her all along.

  Anna and Emma were chatting with Cora and her daughters when Jacob walked up.

  “I’m stealing my bride.” He grabbed Anna’s hand and eased her away from the group.

  Emma grinned, her hands on her hips. “And where are you two off to?”

  Jacob just smiled and pulled Anna along with him. They rounded the corner of the house, and the instant they were out of sight, Jacob pulled her close and kissed her the way a husband kisses his wife.

  “I kept my promise to your grandfather, but I couldn’t wait one more minute.” He pulled her close and kissed her again. “Can you believe we have our own buggy and the down payment for a haus?”

  “I know!” Anna bounced up on her toes. “Mammi has been doing so much for everyone, and she seems so happy doing it.”

  “I love you, Anna Hostetler.”

  “I love you too, Jacob Hostetler.” She was sure the smile on her face was going to be there forever.

  He kissed her again, but Anna eased him away. “I have a question for you.” She reached into her apron pocket, pulled out her dime, and held it up between two fingers. “What did you wish for the day we put the dimes on the train track?”

  Jacob reached into the pocket of his black pants. “This dime?” He smiled.

  “You have yours today too,” Anna said softly.

  “Of course.” He kissed her tenderly on the mouth, his hand cupping her jaw. Then he nodded. “Come on. I’ll show you.”

  He pulled her around the corner to the yard where most of their guests were in view. “Look.” He pointed to his parents. Both of them were laughing and chatting within a circle of about ten people, including his sisters. Then he nodded to his left, where Abe and Eli were also enjoying themselves with a group of kids.

  “I wished that we’d all heal somehow. That’s what I wished for. For peace. Leah would have wanted that.”

  Anna wrapped her arm around his waist, wondering if he was going to ask her what she’d wished for that day at the tracks.

  “But a dime on a train track didn’t make all this happen.” He draped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “I prayed for it every day.” He turned to her and kissed her on the cheek. “I prayed for healing. And I prayed for you. For you to love me.”

  Anna had to blink the happy tears away as gratitude washed over her.

  “And I do.” She glanced toward heaven as she said it.

  Thank You.

  Reading Group Guide

  1. Early in the story, Anna overhears Ben and Rubin talking badly about her grandfather. How do you think things would have played out if Anna had not heard this conversation and decided to ask Jacob out?

  2. Bishop Byler is a stern man who is imposing rules that are already in place. What are some of the forces driving his actions?

  3. Marianne believes her husband’s strict ways have driven her to keep secrets. Do you agree with this or does Marianne need to accept some of the responsibility for her actions? Are you keeping secrets from a spouse or loved one, and if so . . . is it
a burden or a necessity? And is there ever really a good reason to keep secrets?

  4. Were you ever concerned about Glenda, the receptionist at the lumberyard? Did you see her as a threat to the relationship that was developing between Anna and Jacob? And what about the jealousy that Anna was feeling? Was it justified? Is jealousy ever justified, no matter the situation?

  5. John can’t cope with Leah’s death, largely in part because he blames himself. Were you angry at John throughout the story? Did you feel sympathy for him? Were you rooting for him to come around or wishing he would just leave the family?

  6. Jacob is taking up the slack and trying to be the head of his grieving household when his father checks out emotionally. What are some of the ways that Jacob does this?

  7. Lucy is clearly the Daughter of the Promise in this story. What are some examples of the ways Lucy is bettering herself in the eyes of the community and in the eyes of the Lord?

  8. Cora is a woman with the best of intentions, but her bitterness often shows through, and she is guilty of judging others. Besides Lucy, who does Cora judge?

  9. Forgiveness is a major theme throughout the book. What are some examples of this? And how does forgiveness of one’s self affect several of the characters?

  10. Why do you think that Cora and Marianne hit it off so well and became friends quickly? Was it their situations with their husbands? Or was there more to it?

  11. Can you name all the Daughters of the Promise?

  Plain Perfect

  Plain Pursuit

  Plain Promise

  Plain Paradise

  Plain Proposal

  Plain Peace

  Amish Recipes

  Cora’s Chicken Bundles

  1 pkg. cream cheese, softened

  ¼ cup sour cream

  1 teaspoon dill weed

  ½ teaspoon salt

  ½ teaspoon pepper

  ½ cup celery, chopped

  ¼ cup onion finely chopped