His Love Endures Forever Page 7

  Levi.

  Six

  DANIELLE HURRIED DOWN THE STAIRS SUNDAY morning, hoping she wasn’t too late. “Wait! I’m going with you.”

  Martha was crossing the den toward the front door when Danielle hit the bottom stair and moved toward her. Martha turned around.

  “Well, well. It’s been weeks since you’ve gone to church with me.”

  Danielle stopped abruptly and grabbed her chest. “What did you do to your hair?”

  Martha put a hand on the back of her hair underneath the butterfly clip and gave a little push. “I know. It didn’t exactly turn out the color I was hoping for.”

  Danielle covered her mouth with her hand for a moment, then eyed Martha’s new dye job some more. “It’s purple.”

  “It’s a dark burgundy. Now let’s go. The Lord will be glad you’re back in church.” Martha turned back around and opened the front door. She always dressed in a knee-length, dark-colored dress to attend worship with her Amish friends, and she insisted Danielle dress conservatively as well.

  Danielle followed Martha out the door wearing clothes that had been previously approved, a navy skirt that hit below the knee and a white blouse. Danielle knew the outfit looked like a private school uniform, especially with the short white socks and white tennis shoes she was wearing. But it made Martha happy, and Danielle knew she hadn’t been living up to her end of the bargain that they’d made last year to go to church every week. Martha didn’t have to know that Danielle had an ulterior motive today. She followed Martha to the car. “Don’t you want to wear a hat or something?”

  “God doesn’t care about the color of my hair.” She turned and glared at Danielle.

  Danielle smiled. It wasn’t God that Danielle hoped to see today at church.

  LEVI HOPED THE men sitting next to him couldn’t hear his stomach rumbling. He’d overslept this morning and barely had time to eat a biscuit before they’d left for the Stoltzfuses’ house. Lillian and Samuel were hosting worship, and as was customary, the men sat facing the women, with the bishop and elders in the middle. With only about fifty folks in attendance representing their small district, he’d been surprised to see Danielle walk in with Martha.

  In the beginning, Martha’s presence at worship had caused worry for some of the older members of their community, but over time they’d all grown to trust and love her. She was a strange woman, but loving and kind. Levi strained his neck to see around his cousin Eli, to see Danielle. She smiled when they locked eyes, and for reasons Levi couldn’t explain, he felt like he was seeing Danielle for the first time. She looked beautiful, her hair pulled to the side in a loose braid, her modest blouse and skirt, with just a hint of lip gloss. His mind began to whirl about the conversations they’d had recently. If he’d thought for one minute that Danielle might convert and become Amish, maybe he would have tried to be more than just friends with her, right from the beginning.

  He’d prayed for days that he hadn’t somehow let God down, but he knew that he’d done what he felt God had called him to do. He’d asked Danielle to marry him, and she’d said no. He couldn’t force her. The thought of his relief shamed him, but he’d always planned to raise his kinner according to the Ordnung and their Amish beliefs. Danielle was gathering in fellowship with those who had a strong faith . . . but he wasn’t at all sure that she was ready to accept his God as her own.

  Most of the service was in German and Pennsylvania Deitsch, but after the meal, Martha always asked questions, so maybe some of it was rubbing off on Danielle. Or maybe it was the baby, and all that was changing for her now, that had her seeking. Either way, he found himself particularly glad to see her today.

  Sarah was sitting one row behind Danielle between her own mother and Levi’s mother. They’d already spoken this morning, and Sarah had voiced her disappointment that no one was hosting a Sunday singing this evening. Levi wasn’t all that disheartened. He and his father had had a hard week of work, and getting to bed early sounded good to him. Or maybe he and Danielle could have a little time together . . . He locked eyes with her again, and she smiled. He’d heard his mother talk about women who were expecting, how they glowed. Maybe that’s what it was with Danielle today. She’d never looked more beautiful.

  When worship was over, the women busied themselves setting the food out, and most of the men gathered outside on Lillian and Samuel’s porch. Since their arrival two years ago, Lillian and Samuel had worked hard to turn their old farmhouse into a fine home, and their progress inspired him. Levi had his eye on a house down the road from where his own family lived. It needed a lot of repair, but Levi could see in his mind’s eye what it could look like with hard work. He had mentioned to Jacob the house on ten acres, and although Jacob had been interested in taking on the project, his wife-tobe was not. So Jacob had ended up building a new house for him and Beth Ann, something much smaller than they could have had if they’d restored the other house. Levi hoped the house would still be available when he chose to get married.

  Married. His eyes slid to Danielle as she passed by a window.

  After listening to Samuel share a few jokes with the men, Levi moseyed back into the house, moving toward the tables set up in the living room, attempting to stay out of the women’s way. But Danielle walked up to him, biting her lip the way she often did when something serious was on her mind.

  “Hi, Ladybug.”

  “Hey.” She took a deep breath. “After we eat, can we take a ride in your buggy and go somewhere to talk?”

  “Ya. What’s wrong?” Levi scratched his chin, his stomach churning from a combination of hunger and wondering what she wanted to talk about.

  “Nothing, really. I just need to talk to you.”

  Levi tried to read her expression, but it was blank. “Okay.”

  “Great. Let me know when you’re ready to leave later.” She seemed to force a smile, then went back to helping in the kitchen. Not a minute later, Sarah was in front of him.

  “I’m surprised to see your friend Danielle here today. She hasn’t attended one of our worship services in weeks.” Sarah folded her hands in front of her and smiled.

  “Ya, I know.” Levi was surprised too, but his mind was more on the food he hoped would be served soon.

  Sarah touched him on the arm. “I know there isn’t a singing tonight, but maybe . . .” She flashed her beautiful smile at him. “Maybe we can go for a ride later.”

  “I—I can’t today.” Levi put a hand on his hip as he shifted his weight. He felt like he was cheating on Sarah, but that wasn’t quite right. Sarah wasn’t officially his girlfriend, and Danielle was just his friend. Guilt started to wrap around him just the same, which was confusing. But he knew Sarah would see Danielle leave with him later. “I have to take Danielle somewhere.”

  “Oh. Where?” Sarah’s smile was back, but it wasn’t the same cheery expression from a few moments ago.

  “Uh . . .” He hadn’t been prepared for that question. “I’m not sure. She wants to talk.” Levi tried to smile, but Sarah’s icy eyes bored into him, so he quickly stilled his expression. Then his mother walked up, and he hoped she’d save him from an awkward moment.

  “And what do you two have your heads together about?” Mamm grinned from ear to ear as she gently nudged Levi. “Planning another outing together?”

  Levi held his breath. So much for saving me from an awkward moment.

  “No. Levi was just telling me that he has to take Danielle somewhere.” Sarah tucked her chin as she folded her hands in front of her.

  Mamm’s eyes locked with Levi’s. “Where in the world do you need to take Danielle? She rode here with Martha.” His mother’s clipped words spewed out as if spending time with Danielle was a sin greater than most.

  “Mamm, it’s not important. Just to talk. We’re friends.” Then Levi turned to Sarah. “Can we get together for the next singing?”

  Sarah’s face lit up. “Ya. I’d like that.” Then a friend of Sarah’s motioned to her, an
d she excused herself. But his mother’s feet were rooted to the ground in front of him as she glared at Levi.

  Levi shook his head. “Don’t say it, Mamm.”

  His mother glanced around before she whispered, “I just hate to see you ruin any opportunity with Sarah. She’s such a nice girl.” Mamm smiled. “And she sure is smitten with you.” She waved her arm across the room toward Danielle, still whispering. “And from what I hear, Danielle has a boyfriend in Alamosa. One of our people.” She gave a quick shake of her head and frowned.

  “Her boyfriend, Matthew Lapp, left town. He left a note for his folks that he didn’t want to be Amish, and he didn’t even tell Danielle good-bye. That’s probably why she needs to talk. She’s upset.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.” His mother pressed her lips together and stared into his eyes.

  “Are you, Mamm?” Levi clenched his fists at his side. “Because I’d like to get my hands on that Matthew. He is a coward, running away like this, and—”

  “Levi. Stop it,” she hissed, drawing him to one side. “We don’t act like that, with such aggression. And I’m sure Danielle can handle her own problems.”

  “Well, I’m her friend. So if she needs to talk, then I’ll take her somewhere to talk.” Levi walked across the room to where his father and some of the other men were taking their seats at one of the tables . . . before he said something to his mother that he would regret.

  DANIELLE COULD BARELY stomach a few crackers during the meal after church. But by the time she and Levi reached a quiet place to talk, Danielle knew her upset stomach was more than morning sickness. It was Levi.

  He pulled off the road into a small park not too far from town, with a jungle gym, swings, and a few picnic tables. There were just enough trees to give it a cozy feel without obscuring the view of the mountains.

  “You look nice in that outfit,” he said, grinning as they got out of the buggy.

  “Danki, dear sir.”

  Levi chuckled. “Quit trying to speak Deitsch.”

  He tethered the horse to a tree in the park as Danielle sat down on one of the picnic tables nearby, resting her feet on the wooden bench. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky, and with the sun beaming down and no breeze, it felt warmer than it had in weeks.

  Danielle leaned forward and put her elbows on her knees, then cupped her chin in her hands. She honed in on the swing set, and she could see herself pushing her son or daughter someday. And there would be laughter. Lots of laughing. She smiled.

  Levi came and sat down beside her. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

  “Can’t we just hang out together for a while?” She drummed her fingers against her temples.

  Levi put his elbows on his knees too, dangling his hands as he stared at his feet. “Ya, we can. But you said you wanted to talk. Might as well tell me now.”

  Danielle’s heart was beating hard. “Do you remember when I first met you?”

  “Ya. I was taking something to Martha from mei mamm. Jam, I think.” They were quiet for a few moments. “Why?”

  She shrugged. “I just wondered if you remembered.” She paused, then twisted to face him. “Do you remember the first time we hung out together?”

  “Ya, I do.” He looked up at her. “You came to worship with Martha, and I could tell you weren’t happy about it. After church we all played volleyball, then I asked you if you wanted to go for a walk.”

  Danielle grinned. “I think your mother about fell over.”

  Levi smiled too, but then narrowed his eyes. “What’s on your mind, Ladybug?”

  “Why do you think we got to be such good friends?”

  “Who knows why God puts people in our lives?” Levi looked into her eyes. “If anyone needed a friend, it was you. I thought if I befriended you, then other members of our community would accept you too. I think you scared everyone when you first arrived.” He shrugged but grinned. “You dressed . . .” He raised one eyebrow. “U h . . . very Englisch.”

  She nudged him playfully. “Yes, I know that I probably dressed a little tacky for your people.” She glanced down at her conservative outfit. “My, how things change.”

  “I like when you dress like you do for worship.” Levi blushed before pulling his eyes away from hers.

  Danielle felt her own cheeks warming as she twisted the hem of her skirt between her fingers and tapped one foot nervously.

  “Danielle, why don’t you just get to the point?” Levi pushed back the rim of his hat and gazed at her. “You can tell me anything.”

  “I would save you if you were drowning!” she blurted out, her eyes filling with tears. She quickly lowered her head.

  Levi leaned down, then gently lifted her chin. “What are you talking about?”

  She stared into his kind eyes, then slowly leaned forward and kissed him on the lips. Not the cheek, like she’d done a couple of times in the past. She lingered there, near his lips, needing to know if he was feeling more than just friendship too.

  When she finally backed away, Levi blinked a few times. “Wow.” His eyes were round. “What was that for?”

  Danielle cupped his cheek in her hand. “Do you still want to marry me, Levi?”

  Levi leaned back a little and sat taller. “I thought you said you didn’t want to.” His jaw tensed, and Danielle wondered if he’d changed his mind.

  “I’ve decided I do want to marry you. If you still want to marry me.”

  Levi stood up, paced in front of the table, then reached into his pocket for his inhaler. Danielle knew that stress often caused him to wheeze. She waited for him to inhale twice. He finally turned around to face her. “I—I’m just surprised.”

  Danielle walked to where he was standing and looked up at him. “If you’ve changed your mind, it’s okay. I’ll still love you.” She grinned. “As my best friend.” But inside she was hoping with all her heart that Levi would want to raise a family with her. “I would have never asked, if you hadn’t asked me first. But if you’re in love with Sarah and don’t think we could ever really be a couple, then I understand. Really.” She knew her voice rose at least an octave by the end, and she was trying hard not to cry, not to guilt him into it.

  She waited for his answer.

  LEVI SWALLOWED HARD. He’d thought he’d done what God asked and that he was free of what had become a burden, but as Danielle stared at him through teary eyes, he knew he was going to make it his mission to be the best husband and father that he could. But at the same time, his heart hurt, knowing he would be leaving the Amish faith.

  “Ya, Danielle. I do want to marry you, and I’ll raise the boppli as my own.” He didn’t move as he waited for her reaction. She just stared at him. “What’s wrong?”

  She swiped at her eyes. “Nothing. I’m just . . .” She started to cry as she mumbled. “I’ll be Amish if you want me to.”

  Levi struggled to keep his own emotions intact. “Danielle, we’ll make this work.” He lifted her chin and stared into her eyes. Even though he wanted what she offered, more than anything in his life, a still, small voice in Levi’s head said that Danielle wasn’t ready for that. He just shook his head. “I can’t ask you to do that.”

  “Could you even be happy, living outside of your community?” Danielle sniffled.

  Levi thought about the house down the street from his parents. “I know of a place not far from my folks’ haus that’s for sale. Even though we wouldn’t be Amish, we’d still be in the area. It needs a lot of work, but maybe together we could make it into something special for our family.”

  “I don’t have much money saved, Levi. You should probably know that.” Danielle sighed.

  “I’ve been saving money. I have enough for a down payment, and we’d just do like so many other young people here. We’ll get a mortgage.” Levi’s heart was racing, but there were a couple of things he had to know. “Danielle . . .”

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you love me?” His heart beat faster.

 
“I think I’ve always loved you.” She smiled.

  “I know that. But do you think you can love me the way a fraa should love her husband?”

  She was quiet for a few moments. “Haven’t you heard that couples who are best friends first always have the best shot at having a successful marriage?”

  That was not the answer Levi was looking for, but how could he fault her for her honesty? He felt exactly the same way, and would pray that their love and friendship would grow into a relationship of increasing depth, a true marriage blessed by God. But there was one other thing he needed from Danielle.

  “I need you to try to have a relationship with God. It’s important to me.”

  Danielle sighed again. “I am trying. I went to church today, didn’t I?”

  Levi smiled, knowing he had his work cut out for him. “Then let’s get married.”

  And this time, Levi initiated the kiss. He tried to push all the worries to the background. Awkward feelings were interspersed with peace and hope . . . a concrete knowledge that he was doing the right thing, doing what God was calling him to do.

  He pulled back and cradled her cheek in his hand.

  Please, Lord, tell me this is right . . .

  Seven

  VERA DETWEILER KNEW THAT THE RAGE SHE FELT was not something God approved of, but it was there just the same. Levi had lost his mind, and it was her job as his mother to talk him out of ruining his life.

  “Calm down, Vera,” her husband said when her voice grew louder.

  “I will not calm down, Elam!” She pointed a finger at Levi. “This is narrisch, and our sohn is ab im kopp.” She swallowed back tears. “You will ruin your life by marrying Danielle and leaving our community.”

  “It’s my life to ruin,” Levi said with enough sarcasm to make Vera want to take him over her knee like she’d done when he was a small boy. He walked closer to her. “I feel called to marry her, Mamm. I told you that. Maybe the Lord is using to me to help Danielle to have a relationship with Him.”